Q & A ABOUT MOTHERHOOD

i wanted to take a few moments to answer this Q&A becuase ive wanted to for so long. I am currently waiting for the dishwasher to finish, and penelope is sleeping. i have my cup of coffee and im listening to jenny lewis, so lets do this.

1. how old were you when your child was born?: I was 23. I think that my age is the perfect age for me to have a child. not too young, but not too old. i do think there could have been a list of things i could have done before becoming a mother, but those things can wait. 
2. what month and year was your child born?: September 2012. she came a week and one day late. she was forced out. something i will not do if i ever get blessed with another pregnancy
3. how did you feel when you found out you were pregnant?: Happiness. overwhelming happiness.
4. who did you tell first?: my husband, of course! he didnt believe it until i got an official word from the dr. 
5. how many pounds did you gain during your pregnancy?: a whopping 40 lbs. i loved it though. wait, what am i saying. i hated it. not the pregnancy itself, but the extra weight on my tiny bones. 
6. what did you crave while pregnant?: um, food. a lot of it. i didnt have a specific thing that i ran to late at night, but i did have repeat food choices. i loved claussen dill pickles, tillamook sliced cheddar, woodstocks pizza, in PB. I craved popsicles too. OHH STAWBERRY MILK.
7. did you find out the gender of your child?: yes. i was so convinced that she was a boy at first. im not sure i even wanted to get my hopes up that it could possibly be a girl. i wanted a little boy for kevin so bad. but thank heaven for little girls, because she ha just stolen and ran away with our hearts. 
8. did you have any complications with your pregnancy?: Complications throughout, no. the very end, did my body want to respond to her leaving the whom? no. i have a stubborn cervix.
9. how much did your child weigh?: 8lbs1oz of total perfection.
10. was your child early or late?: fashionably late. by one week, one day.
11. what is the most challenging heath issue your child has faced?: since birth? id say when she was constipated. idk if thats a heath issue...but she has only gotten one cold since birth, and we snuggled the sickness away.
12. what is your favorite part about being a mom?: my favorite part of being a mom has to be the way my daughter looks at me. i know she loves and needs me. that can be a scary thing at times, because i dont want that look to ever change. i want to go through my life keeping that same look on her face. i love waking up early in the morning before her, and just staring at her while she is dreaming. i love nursing my baby. i love the bond we have, and i can see myself nursing her well into her toddler years. i love that we get to stay at home together everyday. i love watching her grow, i love watching her learn new things and figuring life out. i love that i will be playing the role of santa, toothfairy, easter bunny, making her halloween costumes. i love all of it. its such a fun and exciting time in my life, and i am so thankful for the moments and memories we make together. 
13. do you think its easier being a mom or a dad?: there is no position thats easier. he goes to work so that i can stay home. i stay home to take care of our baby, and not take her to daycare. i do the housework-or-try. we both have our roles. and we are both trying to figure out a balance. I tend to want to pass her off to him when he gets home from work, but i have to remember that he needs to unwind from his workday, and sometimes just needs to relax for a second. I need time to relax as well, but i kinda relax all day anyways. it is difficult taking care of a baby all day, between the diaper changes, feedings, spit up, and meltdowns, but i wouldnt chose to be anywhere else. 
14. what is the best piece of advice you could give to someone who is about to have their first child?: sleep when the baby sleeps. i know, i know, you hear it all the time and you wont figure it out until about the third week. but seriously. freeze some meals or stock up on food that you can quickly chow down on. if you dont eat, you will pass out. believe me. also, its okay to be sad. its normal to feel less than blissful after you have the baby. one thing i learned was that more often than not, mothers are very sad after giving birth. its just the way it is. no one likes to admit that they are depressed when they have such a little blessing in their life now, but you know what? it happens. it happened to me, but my situation was shit. i made sure that i spoke up. i made sure to ask for help. i reached out to other people, and i didnt let it get the best of me. please, if you are reading this and are feeling this way, shoot me an email. i can be that person who will listen. ive been there. and lastly..... enjoy those newborn days. they go soooo quickly. it will make ya head spin honey. 
15. did you always think you would have kids?: yes. i was born for this role.
16. what has been the biggest surprise about motherhood? the biggest surprise for me is that its changed me completely. for the better. i know i was super awesome before having her-i kid-, but not its a whole new world. everything i do is for her. for her enjoyment. 
17. are there things you miss about life before her?: yes. i miss going on long rides with my husband and talking about everything. we used to drive up and down coast highway and talk for hours. i miss jumping in the car and going somewhere really quick. i miss sleeping on my stomach. i miss taking long showers and baths. i miss wearing makeup. i miss taking naps in the afternoon..alone.
18. how many children do you have?: one.
19. do you plan on having more?: yes, when my husband gives us the okay. id like to be more settled and my husband out of the navy, and me having my RN...but we will see.
20. who is the mom you admire most?: Marie Burke Kenny. hands down. i will always be thankful to have known her. i cant believe i am tearing up writing this. the tears just came out of no where. she is the most amazing woman ive ever met. she as supposed to be in my life, and so was conor and cara. she is intelligent, kind, funny, loving, and just awesome. she is a single mother, lawyer, awesome friend, and was a one of a kind boss. she always offered up any and all advice with a balanced perspective. i loved her mom, kitty, too. she inspires me daily.