I could go on and on about the things I love that are weird but that list will go on forever. I can however let you in on the very first memories of where by weirdness stemmed, It goes back to my childhood, living in my grandparents house in Oceanside, CA.
Since it is close to Halloween, it is fitting to start the month off with a weird and creepy story.
When I was about five or seven, or even six.... My grandfather died. I loved him so much. He was a younger man, in his sixties. He died while he was sleeping on his couch in a front living room. My best friend Claudia, who lived across the road would walk his dog for him sometimes. She came over to find that my grandfather was not answering the door, but the front door was wide open, just the screen door was shut & locked. I am not sure if this next part was my imagination, or if it really happened, but Claudia looked in the window and found my grandfather there on the couch. I believe she went to the neighbor and asked for help, and they came etc. Now I was a tiny girl and this is what I remember from hearing adults talking around me. I cant be sure if this was what happened or if this is all something made up in my head. Either way, its the story i've been telling myself since it happened so lets just move on.
My mother was given the home after my grandfather passed away. It took a long time for the things that reminded me of my grandfather to fade away. The smell of his pipe tobacco, the blankets that he used to keep on the sofa, the candies that he used to hide in the cupboard for us. My mother never got rid of the couches that he died on. This is where my paranoia came from the weird living/dead supernatural etc.
For as long as I can remember I knew ghosts were real. My childhood was filled with watching Hocus Pocus, The Craft, Now & Then, Witches of Eastwick, Teenwich, ect. I wanted to be able to speak to the dead, cast spells, voodoo dolls. As a young girl, these desires are weird right? I think so. Anyway. I felt my grandfather in the home when I was with my mom. My mother and father were separated, I spent some nights with my mom, some with my dad. When I was at my moms I could hardly sleep. I always felt as if I was being watched, or that someone was always right next to me. It was not until years later that my mom felt the presence, as she was throwing out those old couches that he passed away on. I was told once to speak to the spirits, acknowledge they are there, and it wont be as bad. Whoever told me that was right. I spoke freely to my grandfather and told him that I would prefer to not feel the way I did, and I would like to be able to sleep at night. I never had a problem sleeping again in that house.
I have always felt a connection with the afterlife, and thats not all. I am truly obsessed with outer space, the unknown out there, and how we can possibly see so far away, but can never travel there. I am amazed with technology and how the human brain is so advanced that we can make a telescope that can see as far as we can. It makes me believe that there are other beings out there that are more advanced than us. To think we are the only intelligent form of life in that vast universe?
UFOs make my heart skip beats. Crop circles amaze me, ancient drawings and statues that are older than dirt, make my brain run in circles. I do believe in magic, the impossible, the weird and unknown. I am a skeptic, thats for sure. I am always second guessing the "norm". In life I really believe there are people who just get by everyday doing what they are told, listening to the news and believing what they say, but I am not one of those people. I love the idea of research and coming to your own conclusions. To have a mind and make your own decisions based on your own thoughts and ideas. Not being swayed by what is popular, or what your family or friends think. Being weird is something I am proud of. I would not have it any other way, really. Keeping it weird since 89'
Thanks for reading my rant.
- I am doing a 30 day writing challenge so if you are interested, I will be posting daily.
xo
Jess
Have you ever watched Cosmos on Netflix? It will blow your mind. I have the hardest time wrapping my head around how small we are. We are so tiny. Everything's so insignificant. Anyway, Cosmos -- I watched a bit of it last night and learned it's certainly possible our universe is a part of many universes. We're not the only ones, and any other intelligent life forms aren't the only ones and on and on. The universe(s) are infinite, and that is so dizzying!
ReplyDeleteGreat post. May I ask where you found the 30 day writing challenge? I always love some good inspiration.
xo,
Malia
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